I am kinda embarrassed to having to do this but don't really have a lot to lose. I am a 51 year old male. I am originally from San Diego and have lived in Los Angeles since 1991. The funny thing is that I do have a family as I am one of 12 but three of my siblings have passed on in the past few years. I lost my father in 2001 and recently my mother passed in December 2015. Since then there has been nothing but despair my mother left a lot of debt and my parents home went to the bank. Being an Executor of my parents estate there were a lot of unpopular decisions that had to be made and it has caused my remaining siblings to go their separate ways. Since my mothers death I have not received any phone calls and mine are not returned as well. I feel completely abandoned and at times it can be tough. Sometimes it can be hard to make it through the day and I sometimes wonder I even exist. There is little for me to look forward too. I work and live alone. To make matters worse in June 2016 my best and closest friend was killed. I am not looking forward to the end of the year and hope that somewhere I can find some peace and happiness once again. I miss my mother very much she was the one ray of hope in my life.